Happy one year!

Hola mis amores;

Today is December 27 and it has been one year since I started this website. I admit I abandoned it for the most of the time, but lots of things have happened this year.

So this post is going to be a reflection over the past year.

Frankly, it has been the worst and the best year for me. If I'm being honest, it's been a very tough year. Things haven’t been great for me mentally and there have been more downs than ups. I'm still learning how to take the downs as a lesson.

Things don’t often make sense. Even now after months have passed there are some things of which I can't make any sense of. I'm trying not to dwell on them because it just leads me a spiral of overthinking and that’s not a good thing.

I made some friendships this year and I'm glad to have those people in my life. I've lost a lot of people this year. I don’t understand why, but it's better to let them go. It took me a long time to understand that you can’t keep people with you against their will. If you do, things are bound to fall apart. No relationship is one sided. It takes both people to put efforts to keep things going smoothly. It's like nourishing a plant. The plant cannot live on water or sunlight alone. It needs both of them to grow and thrive.

Learning to let go has been hard. I've had to let people go who I’ve known for years all because all the efforts I’ve put weren’t enough to make them stay. I don’t wish anything but the best for them. If I'm not helping you grow, it’s okay if you leave. You deserve to grow regardless.

I wish I could speak openly about all the things that went down mentally for me this year. But I need time. I'm not yet ready to share details that I haven’t told even people closest to me. I'm not afraid of how people will react, it’s more to do with how I feel like these secrets are a part of me and sharing them will make them go away. It’ll take time for me to understand how to let out my feelings as well as how to talk about them to others.

I hope this year has treated you much better! Merry Christmas and a very Happy new year to you guys. I'm grateful to the people who read, because otherwise I'd not be here today.

Loads of love!